Hard Things of Faith

It’s been several years since the Lord whispered these words to me for the first time.    It was a moment I will never forget.  I was in my car, headed to a women’s bible study group.  Now, please don’t be offended when I say that women's bible study can be a huge blessing, but it can also be a huge headache.  I was leading a class, so I had to go, but I was worn to the core and didn’t know if I had anything left to pour out.   If I am being really honest, when I get to that level of weariness, grace and kindness are not what pours out of me.  All it takes is for some unknowing person to say something or do something, and what comes out of me is more like salt & vinegar.  I remember driving and not being able to formulate words that could be construed as prayer. But God.... he knew exactly what I was saying.  Ever so gently, he whispered:  “Mercies & Manna” My heart was put to ease immediately. I love how the Lord doe...

I have been pretty quiet as the world has navigated some difficult things.  Mostly though I have been quiet because that is what I have felt the Lord tell me to do.  If you know me at all, you know that I was there before the Lord saying “ But Lord!  Hard Things of Faith!  We are living through some of the hardest things some people have ever seen and you want me to be quiet?!?”   When Coivid-19 broke out in the United States, a woman I know sent me a message.   She sent me a message and the gist if it was “Rest”.  She told me she was praying for me and then told me specifically what she was praying for me. That is the mark of someone who has really been praying for you, they tell you what they are praying for.  She gave me the scripture verse and then told me to rest.  As I have watched the world fall out over a virus and then my homeland fall out over racism, I have been socially quiet. I...

                        I woke up this morning intending to do a FB Live video. January has been a month of bringing awareness to  Post-abortive Healing.  I wanted to address a question that I have heard through the years about abortion.  That did not happen.     The sky over the mountain range was beautiful and inviting.  The sun was out and warm, but the wind was strong.  I like to record from different places in the city, but recording would have to be done from an enclosed location due to the wind, so off I went to look for the perfect place.   Once I found a place I liked, I started to gather my thoughts.  I can’t talk about this subject without talking about her. It should not be a surprise by now, but sometimes I am still caught off guard by how much I am moved by her.   Even though I have never seen her.  The child I was once a...

“And Hallelujah, Grace like rain falls down on me” The first time I heard these lyrics, there was a three-fold reaction, heartbreak, surrender, and belief.  To be honest, I couldn’t even tell you which one came first.  It was the moment I become acutely aware of my sinful nature, the Lord’s love, and God’s willingness to show me the grace I did not deserve.  Somewhere there had to be knowledge of these things when I gave my life to the Lord, but the understanding of these things became so much more clear when I heard this song.  I have struggled most of my Christian walk to fall in line with the rest of the Body of Christ.  There was always this thought that I could never be as “good” as them.  I didn’t realize that I had been trying to live down a reputation that haunted me for years.  I wanted so badly to be “good” and have a reputation that was fitting of a good Christian woman.  The thought was, to fit in wit...

Someone once told me to write about what I am afraid to write about.   I will tell you, I do not write this entry lightly and there is part of me that is fearful, but I cannot be silent.  This entry is about a subject that causes division around the world.  This entry is about the reaction to abortion.  This is not a debate on being pro-life or pro-choice, this is a conversation about how we respond or react to this subject and to people we disagree with.  This is also a conversation about how we show the love of Christ to those who have chosen to terminate a pregnancy. It is a vicious fight between pro-life and pro-choice people alike.  The one thing they have in common is the passion in which they fight.  This subject is hard and it’s emotional.  People are passionate about it on both sides.  My question is this, shouldn’t we as Christians be able to have the hard conversation and sh...